Dear Daughter I Dream of Having

I didn’t always know what I wanted to do, but I knew what kind of woman I wanted to be.

-Diane von Furstenberg

I’m not sure if yall have noticed it yet, but I am a huge fan of empowering women. I believe that God made us to have a gentle strength. We have the ability to love with such capacity that we suffer repeatedly through the process of child birth and call it “beautiful”. We have the ability to support our husbands and family in their times of need, no matter our personal struggles that day.

We are beautiful. We are special. We are fearfully and wonderfully made.

So why is it that I see more and more women purposefully putting themselves into a lesser place? Maybe its a misunderstanding on where/what our value comes from. In this, the “Age of the Selfie-Stick”, I think that it’s easy to become confused. Now, don’t get me wrong, ya girl LOVES a good selfie (with a filter or two). And I even own a selfie stick. But maybe it’s time we take a good hard look at ourselves… no filters. YIKES!

I’ve been thinking a lot about this one… and I’ve decided to write this as if I were telling my daughter. I don’t have a daughter (yet, hopefully) but I think that these are some of the things I would want her to know. Also, this is for my friends, the women, who are in that waiting place. The women who love everyone else except themselves enough to be BETTER. This is my advice to TODAY’S women. The world is a scary place… we need our women to be brave. So, here it goes.

Dear Daughter I Dream of Having:

You’re going to be born into a world that is very, very different from the world I was born into. You’re going to have a lot more critics on a daily basis than I could have imagined. I’ve made a list of things that I don’t want you to forget in this crazy and confusing world.

woman1Trust GOD. Every morning, talk to Him. Trust Him to nudge you in the right direction.  I’ve had many, many talks with Him and even from my lowest, He hears me all the way into the Heavens. Trusting Him will NEVER hurt you. Life will seem unbearable at time and there is NOTHING His love won’t overcome. Take a breath and Trust God.

Be YOUrself. “If all your friends jump off a bridge, are you going to?” Age old question right there yet it still applies. If I have learned one thing, it’s that embracing who I am has made me much more secure. You’ll be judged for it but who cares. I have never drank alcohol or been drunk. I don’t have a SnapChat. I didn’t know what “thats Gucci” meant until someone told me (like a few weeks ago!). Yet I’m still surrounded by friends and family that love me. Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter won’t mind.  You don’t have to always fit the mold. Break it.

Say Actual Words. STOP TEXTING EVERYTHING.ALL.THE.TIME. Use the phone and call people. Break the silence. All I hear all around me are little ticks from the keyboard of iPhones. Talk to people. Say hello when someone walks into the quiet room. To be brave enough to SAY what you feel – THAT is courage. Who cares if your voice shakes, SAY it. Please, find your voice.

“Bitch” does NOT mean “Independent”. Please, for the love of all that is Holy, QUIT saying that B-Word in the context that it makes you a strong, independent woman. That is false. It is NOT a compliment when someone calls you that. Its not cute. Don’t embrace it… “Oh, I know I’m a B-. Whatevs.” Please. Stop. Be kind. Be smart. Be Independent. Be Strong. You are able to be ANYTHING you want to be… why be a B-?! Love yourself enough to not talk to yourself or about yourself like that.

Be Honest but be kind. “I just tell it like it is.” True. Ok, I get it. But how about you tell it like it is while remembering that no matter what YOU think of the person on the other end of your truth, they have feelings that you can’t see/hear/feel. Be kind when you’re being honest. It’s called Tact. Lift people up and offer perspective. But please remember to always be kind. No one will remember your intentions, only how you made them feel.

Let a good man love you. You’ll come across guys that look good, guys that seem good
and guys that ARE good. A lot of times, after you’ve had your heart broken, (& you will. It’s a part of life. You’ll be okay, sweet girl.) you will push away the good guys becauseus “good” guys will want to commit to you and LOVE you. Part of your brain/heart will find a dark place that says “Commitments always end badly. I’m not ready to be loved. I’m not good enough.” Don’t listen. You ARE worthy of love… the good guys aren’t always the “cool” ones… that wont matter after your 20’s. Trust me. Trust that nudge from God we were just talking about. Let yourself be loved by the good ones (like your Daddy) ❤

Put your phone down. LOOK UP. The world is happening all around you. Go be a part of it. No one has ever made history by hiding behind their phone. Go meet people. Don’t sit in a silent sauna… strike up a conversation. People are waiting for someone like YOU to change their day. Be a light in someones life. They need it more than you think.

There’s probably so much more for me to say, but I’ll take my own advice and trust God that one day you will be here for me to bestow this and much more love and wisdom to. And to those women who this applies to TODAY, believe in yourself. Give yourself some credit and don’t fall victim to the easy way out. Break the mold and show the world how awesome God made us.

Love you all.

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So… I suck at this “mom” thing…

ISO: Owners manual for children that apparently got delivered to some moms, but not the rest of us.

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Every day, I ask myself if I’m doing a good job at this “mom” thing. Every day, the answer is “No.” Everywhere you turn there is someone telling you that what you’re doing is wrong and what they’re doing is right. EVERYWHERE. As a matter of fact, I read something this morning, (I can’t remember if it was a Facebook post or a blog) but it basically listed all the things I’m doing “wrong” as a mom. It consisted of the following: I don’t love my child if I fed him formula. I am a zealot if I teach him about the Bible.  I should avoid red meat, gluten & all sugar and processed foods…. oops. I should co-sleep and never spank him… oops again. Well…. I guess it’s true. I really do SUCK at this mom thing…. according to this stranger with a laptop.

I know I can’t be alone in feeling this way. I know I can’t be the only mom who thinks she sucks at this some days. I am not alone. Right?!

So, in light of all the “wisdom” floating around the internet, I’ve decided to make my OWN list of Mom Things. These are things that I have actually done/thought/said/considered. Am I mom of the year? Probably not. Am I trying my best? EVERY.DAMN.DAY.

what you see vs. what you get #momlife

Note: I am humble enough to know that these OPINIONS of mine are in fact, only opinions. They are not facts. Therefore, I will not debate with others who believe that their opposing opinions ARE in fact, facts. 

  1. Breast Feed. Formula Feed. Who cares?! As long as you FEED! Thats your business. My son had leftover pizza for breakfast today. Shockingly, he still alive. For lunch, he’ll have broccoli and grilled chicken. BALANCE,people. Balance.
  2. Its ok to want to punch your smart-mouthed back talker. Just don’t actually do it. (My mom gave me this advice…) Kids are infuriating. They’re humans and are allowed to act out from time to time. Hey Mom… so are YOU!
  3. Whats your kids bedtime? 7pm? 10pm? Where does he sleep? With you? In his own room? What brand of toothpaste do you use? Toilet paper, over or under? Are you a sock, shoe, sock, shoe or a sock, sock, shoe, shoe person? DO YOU SEE HOW NONE OF THESE QUESTIONS SHOULD MATTER TO YOU?!  Why do people have an opinion about when your kids sleep? My son goes to bed late according to the standard for a 5 year old. He goes to bed at 10. Why? His daddy works until 8. We value TIME more than bedtime. Sue us.
  4. My son just came into my office and said “I make the rules here!” Please refer to #2.
  5. Quit comparing yourself to other moms. Haven’t you ever heard of mothers intuition? You were divinely chosen to be the mommy to your littles. Trust yourself.
  6. Ya know those moments where you think? Crap. Well I just said/did the wrong thing.  (For example, my yelling at cars in traffic and Kam saying “All these other drivers stink.” …. and me high-fiving my son for being a grade-A road-rager.) Not my most shining mom moment. Forgive yourself and move on. Try to NOT do it again…
  7. “Back when I was young and kid-free…” Those words. Those words do NOT make you a bad mom. Yearning for the days of freedom does NOT make you a bad mom. You are an individual. Being a mom is just part of who you are now.
  8. Its ok to take a time out every now and then. Mommy sometimes needs to make mommy happy. A happy mommy is a good mommy. (Hear that, hubby?!)
  9. I am a stay at home mom. Does that mean I think working moms are sub par? No. I was raised by a single, working mom. Nothing irks (is that a word?) my nerves more than a SAHM posting on Facebook about how much goes into it and a working mom comment with a snide “Try doing that AND having a job.” And the same applies to the working mom who says its so hard and the SAHM saying “At least you get to talk to grown ups during the day.” Who wins here? I’ll tell ya – not the 2 women trying to prove they are “better” by arguing on Facebook. Are you trying your best with your situation? Good. That’s all that matters (or should matter.)
  10. My son just came into my office again and said “You’re the best girl, mommy. I love you all the stars in the sky.” Please denote and disregard #2.

To sum it up, not one mom is like the other yet we are ALL the same. We gave life to these little humans and it’s our job to help them become the best adults they can be. We are all out here just fakin’ it til’ we make it. Mom-shaming should be nonexistent in my opinion. I can confidently say that no one will ever LOVE our children as much as we do. No one loves my son the same was I do. My sun rises and sets on this little boy. If doing the best I can is wrong, I don’t want to be right. None of us got that manual… or at least I didn’t.

So are you doing it wrong? Probably. But so are the rest of us. 🙂

Now, go love the crap outta the little monsters!

XoXo,

Brittany

So, you think I’ve got it all figured out?

Dear Person who thinks I’ve got it all together:

Hey there. I see you… seeing me. I see your likes and comments about “How do you do it?!” I see you comparing yourself to me and my “almost perfect” life. I see you… and you think you see me, but you don’t. You see what I choose to show you. You see the life I expect myself to have. I keep your rose colored glasses on… until today. Today, I will show you what you haven’t seen. Today, you will SEE ME.

Today, I woke up and didn’t feel so great. The weather was dreary and I just wasn’t present in my day. I turned on the TV for Kamden instead of playing with him like I normally do. I didn’t get up to hug my husband as he left for work like I normally do. Today, I just sat. I probably could have sat there all day, letting Netflix parent my son. I opened my iPad because… well, that’s what people do nowadays I guess, and my blog popped up. I read a blog by ME from 3 years ago and realized that I was inspired to get up by ME. Did I feel proud? Nope. Know what I felt? Guilt.

How did I get here?

12096049_10156057623450234_1594053140868159603_nAs I started to beat myself up about being “not good enough”, Kamden came around the corner and said “You’re my best girl, mommy.” Wow. REALITY CHECK. I owe it to my son to be my best. I owe it to my husband to be my best. Most importantly, I owe it to MYSELF to be my best. So, in order for me to be my best, I have to be honest with myself. And it started by letting you SEE ME.

I write a fitness blog. I am a leader with Advocare, one of the world’s leading nutrition and wellness companies. I have lost 85 lbs in my journey. I home school my son & inspire others with my words & advice. That’s what YOU see. What I see is that I had began to fall short of the person I was. I quit eating correctly. I quit working out. I quit inspiring others. I was uninspired. I quit holding myself accountable. Don’t you see?! Don’t you see why I felt like I wasn’t good enough?! I felt like a fraud…. because much like you, sweet girl who thinks I have it all together, I was looking at YOU thinking “How does she do it?!” So how do I get out of this space?

Step 1: Forgive myself and give myself GRACE.

Did you know I turned 30 this past December? Yep. The big 3-0. I had been dreading it for the last 365 days…I anticipated that turning 30 would be the beginning of the end. Turns out, it was the end of the beginning. I’m anxious about putting this out there is cyberland but here goes. On December 28, 2015, my 30th birthday, Nate and I spent the evening in the emergency room. We had suffered a miscarriage that night. I’m not going to dive into the details of that. But THAT moment…. I need to forgive myself for THAT moment. I had dreaded my birthday for completely selfish reasons… until that night. Right now, with you as my witness, I am giving myself permission to be forgiven and to receive grace for that moment in time, when I thought that the onset of crows feet would be the reason turning 30 sucked…

Crap. Now I’m crying. 

Gotta move on now… After the birthday debacle, I let myself be surrounded by white
noise. (Some of you may not understand what I’m saying – some of you may). I gained weight, very quickly. Well, today, officially 6 lbs down and 10 inches down since January 11, I forgive myself. (I’m also thanking my lucky stars for Advocare!) I am allowing myself the permission

before and after 2.3

Left: February 1, 2016 Right: January 11, 2016

to be a human who can’t always keep it together. And before you think it… NO! I did not “Start over”. Gah. I can’t stand when people say that. You don’t ever start over. You always know more than you did the first time you started. You are just moving again. Thats what forgiveness does! It allows you the permission to pick up the pieces, a more experienced (not necessarily smarter) version of who you were, and move FORWARD. I’m back in the gym 5-6 days a week and eating to fuel my body, not my emotions. BOOYAH BABY!

 

So, for this morning, I forgive myself. It was a moment. A blip on my radar of life. I’m never going to quit. I’m never going to stop being my best for my family. I am officially granting myself grace and forgiveness. YOU SHOULD TOO.

I know you think you saw me before… and I know you may have compared yourself to me. But now I hope you SEE me. And forgive yourself. None of us have it all together. Being a wife is hard. Being a mom is hard(er). Being a decent human is hard. Don’t think I’m any different, please! I do NOT have it all together. I just know that nothing, even my worst days, will be enough to make me quit. And THANK YOU for believing in me so much that I was brave enough to put this out here. You’re my muse.

Xoxo,

Brittany.

 

The Housefly: Your biggest enemy?

I don’t want to look back on my life in twenty years and realize I wasted the precious time I had with my children by living in a state of perpetual distraction.

I have spent a lot of time the past couple weeks actually pondering on this blog – planning this one. Yall – this is a pretty big improvement considering that I normally just give yall whats on my mind, good or bad! haha Anyways, today… I wanted to talk about the housefly. Those gross little black, buzzing mutants that pop up out of nowhere and usually lay dead (after weeks of driving you crazy) on your window sill. Lets talk about this for a minute.

A few weeks ago, we were at church and the pastor said something that has stuck with me so heavily. THAT is why I actually did some planning for THIS blog. He said our biggest enemy is DISTRACTION; distraction from our goals, distraction 98dc548f1681d39ab62621112a2bfe8bfrom our family, distraction from our real priorities. Then, he compared that distraction to a housefly. Lets set the scene… you’re sitting in your living room watching American Ninja Warrior (so your pumped, right?!) and you hear it… the dreaded buzz of a housefly. It whips into your line of sight for just a moment before buzzing around the corner. OF COURSE you have jumped off the couch and will continue to hurl pillows, newspapers and shoes in the direction of that fly until it goes home to see his maker! By the time you’ve caught the little sucker, it’s highly likely that you’ve knocked over a lamp, almost pulled down some curtains or knocked over a picture frame by throwing a “throw” pillow across the room. See what I did there? 😉 If you’re lucky – after all this, you’ve killed him. And hopefully his friends aren’t hiding in the blinds.

Reading all this just stressed you out a little huh? There is NOTHING more annoying than that housefly buzzing around your head. However, there is also nothing more HARMLESS. Flies can’t hurt you. They can’t poison you. They can’t build a nest in the corner. Literally, all they can do is buzz around and eventually escape or die. We give them ALLLLLLLL this attention and energy… and for what?!

This is exactly how distraction works in our day to day lives. I have fallen victim to distraction more times than I’d like to admit. Let me give you an example. I had a goal that I wanted to start working out at 4:30am… seriously. No. It’s not fun. No. It’s not easy… and yes. I’m bitter. haha Anyways, I wanted to wake up and go… but some weird mechanism in my brain said “Well you can’t wake up to go to the gym if your clothes aren’t laid out. So, I have to do laundry first. Well, I don’t want to put the rest of the laundry away in a dirty room. So I have to clean my room first. Wait. I can’t go to the gym on an empty stomach. I need to go to the grocery store so I can make homemade protein bars.” So on and so on and so on. Next thing you know, it’s 2 weeks later, my house is spotless, laundry is done and groceries are stocked…. but still no gym. As a matter of fact, I didn’t work out AT ALL during that time. I was too distracted. <<< Yall… this is a housewives version of distraction. Let me give you something a little more broad! haha

You have a goal. I don’t know what your goal is. Its a goal… for the sake of this blog, lets say that the goal is to spend 1 hour a night fully committed and engaged with your family. Games, dinner, bedtime stories. Whatever it is. THAT is your goal. Night one, CHECK! I am the Phase 10 masstterrrrr!. Night two, 30 minutes because I had a long day at work. So HALF CHECK! Bedtime stories read. Night three, ……. Facebook. TV. Exhaustion. Work calls. Friend calls. Before you realize it, it’s bedtime and you missed your hour. Night four….. well, you catch my drift.

Yall – sometimes the boogie man isn’t dressed in a trench coat carrying a knife. Sometimes he comes in the form of a distraction… a housefly. Things that at the time seem harmless. There is nothing wrong with Facebook, some TV, some 96bf7ddaf5f2530dc15126f372219a9edown time. But sometimes, those things take away from your destination and your purpose. Something that takes you away from the path you are designed to follow. Something that takes you away from what RIGHT for what’s RIGHT NOW. Just like the housefly, something is going to take all of your attention away from it’s original agenda. Don’t be afraid of letting the dishes go for a night. Don’t be afraid of letting that call go to voicemail or that show go unwatched…. because just like that housefly, it may be annoying but it won’t hurt you. You have bigger and better things to focus on.

My challenge for you is this: Look at your day to day life. Have you filled the space between your ears with distractions? Have you missed out on things or avoided opportunities all for the sake of feeling validating in accomplishing your tasks of distraction? If you have (lets be real, most of us have!), IGNORE THE FLY. Take control of your life & your time. Be aware of the things that fill your mental space. Remove the harmless things that add no value. Write down the day you start and let me know in a week how your life has changed!

Love you guys!

Time to Come Out of Hiding

Hey everyone! (or those of you that are left after my 7 months of being MIA). Looks like I’m back – again. **Can I pause for a moment just to say that consistency has always been a struggle of mine?!** Anyways, here I am. Back at it again. To be honest, I was waiting for the day that I felt I had something profound and wise to say before I wrote again – but in living my work from home mommy life, I find that the profound moments in my life wouldn’t make up a blog – itd be more of a “blip” if you will. So, today I got the idea to just come back and write. Nothing major is going on in our lives. But I guess that’s the best part about writing this blog. I get to write to people who maybe are also going through the motions of life right now with nothing major going on. Yes – I’m speaking to you. I’ve just decided. I’m speaking to all of you who are waiting for the next big thing – or those of you who are distracting themselves with life’s busy work until they can face that big thing. Whatever the case may be…. I think I just found my audience! (P.S. I am writing this without having taken any notes or written an outline – so I apologize if I’m scattered!)

The truth is, comparing ourselves to others doesn’t just steal our joy, it robs those around us of the rare gift of a woman who has learned to offer her uniqueness to the world.

One of the best things about writing this blog over the years has been that it is a way for me to be transparent with myself about things and process them through written word. I don’t want people to think that I would only write about things I find myself to be an expert in… trust me, in most cases, I’m writing to myself. LOL The few readers I do have are just lucky to get to read my most inner thoughts 😉  So, here goes my note to self for the day:

Dear Brittany:

I know that you have read the quote “Comparison is the thief of joy” and I know that you believe it. I also know that you don’t care and you still let comparison steal your joy on a daily basis. Trust me – you can thank the internet and social media for that one! You wake up every day and literally do the same thing. It doesn’t matter what day of the week it is… heck, truthfully, it doesnt even matter if you sleep in. The world and all its participants will continue with their day around you. Sometimes, being a mom can feel like a speed bump in the journey of life you planned for yourself when you were 20. (Whew. Sorry guys – I feel guilty just for WRITING that!) But nonetheless, we feel that way. You see all of these people traveling the world and taking the coolest pictures with their Go Pros and Selfie-Sticks. You read all these statuses about people hanging out with “the crew” on the weekends. You look around and realize you drive on the same 3 streets in your town to get everywhere and never venture out. All of that can be stifling! How dare all these people go on all these adventures and live these exciting lives while you hole up in your house, settled in your routine?! **Shutter Sound* Close down facebook a11702999_10155661766755234_2560883408378194439_npp.** Close laptop** Quit answering texts** (if you can’t tell, you’re pouting). …………….. Uhhhhh……….. SERIOUSLY?! What in the HECK are you doing?!?! Let me tell you what you’re doing. You’re acting like all of those things on the FB app are things that you’d rather be doing. You’re acting like you don’t smile everytime you see your own street from your front porch. Heres the deal, Self! (I’m mad now!) Your life is just as you want it right now. You may not post pictures of being in different countries but you will one day. Right now, you have the hugs of your little boy to fill and the arms of your husband to lay in to watch a movie in the comfort of your beautiful home. You may not post about hanging with the “crew” this weekend but you have friends to spare. Right now, you have a few people close enough who you enjoy being with SO much, that you don’t HAVE to post about it… as a matter of fact, you’ve forgotten to even look at your phone! You may not go to many places, doing many things in your town but you know your way around the block! 😉 Right now, you have the ability to go where YOU need to go… not where a job dictates to you… and go right back home to run around your own backyard with your little boy. You get to be home when your husband gets off work with dinner and a clean house waiting. You are blessed. Don’t you ever, ever, ever… let comparison steal your joy again!

Love, Self. 🙂

Why I refuse to make a New Years resolution

Letting go of what you have but don’t want will make room for all the things that you do want. What are we so afraid of?

First of all, it’s been tooooo long since I last wrote. Second of all, I feel like writing today makes sense because of the significance of this day in Nate and I’s life. So – here I am. I am hoping that this one blog can help me get my blog rolling again… haha!

Alright. So we all know whats coming… the New Years Resolutions. “New Year. New me.” “Work hard. Play hard.” You 0123know the drill… but there is one thing I think that none of us think about when making this “resolution” list. I think that imagining 2015 without really thinking about 2014 won’t help. Lets be honest, when the clock strikes 12 on January 1, YOU arent going to transform into a new person. I think that’s the problem with New Year’s resolutions. We seem to think that because the numbers are different (which they are every other day of our life), that we will be able to do things we couldn’t accomplish in any other year before. So, this is what I think.. What can we remove from 2014? We have established that YOU will be the same… but what in 2014 kept you from your goals? Aren’t resolutions just goals, after all? Were you distracted? Excuses? Toxic people? Lets work on removing things from 2014 so that they can no longer exist in 2015! If you want to get healthy, remove the excuses that kept you from going to the gym in 2014. If you want to make more money, remove the fears of chasing your dreams because it isn’t “safe” in 2014. If you want to be happier, remove toxic people from your life. Sounds easy, right? haha Well the problem is that excuses, fear and a QUANTITY of people make us so distracted that we seem to forget our goals. The excuses aren’t excuses – in 2014, you call them “reasons”. The fear isn’t fear – in 2014, you call it “being realistic.” The toxic people aren’t toxic people – in 2014, you call them “friends.” Do you see? In 2014 you have renamed all these things to make them acceptable. What do you want to call them in 2015?

I know you all have resolutions in your mind – but have you challenged yourself? I CHALLENGE YOU. Make a list of the things you have in your life RIGHT NOW that you no longer want. Make a list of the things you want. Now, go for it!! Why not? What is holding you back? Is it “reasons” or “realism” or “friends”? Simplify your life and get back to the basics. It’s not about a New Years resolutions. It’s about changing your way of thinking… whether it be on January 1 or August 8.

ron10 months ago TODAY, Nate and I changed our way of thinking. We took a risk on a company that our “friends” said was a joke. That our “reasons” said we couldn’t be successful at something like this. That our “realism” said was too much of a risk. WE CHALLENGED OURSELVES. We looked at our life and realized that at some point you have to jump from the cliff of the land of where you are and are comfortable to the land that is unknown. I am so grateful that Advocare came into our life and INTERRUPTED our cynical way of thinking. We have made an additional full time income while never sacrificing the “stay at home mom” aspect of our life. We have been able to share our blessing with other families who now are bringing parents home full time. Our dreams will come true. Our son will have a different relationship with health and money – because we have decided to change it. We all want change but no one is willing to change anything.

Will it be easy? No. Will it be worth it? YES.

How can I help you make 2015 all that you imagined? ❤

My Advice – To those who are listening.

Hey All! A couple of days ago, I posted a status on my Facebook asking my friends for ideas for a new blog. I got several good ones so it seems like I will be writing a lot over the next couple weeks! 🙂 But one of the suggestions was for me to write on finding and living a purpose driven life. First of all, let me say that I am SO humbled by the fact that people actually want to hear what little ol’ me has to say about something so BIG. Second of all, I am a work in progress myself… so in this blog, I promise to do my best to deliver what I believe is good advice.

If you read my last blog “A Note to My Younger Self: Advice to Get Through Your Early 20s“, I talked about how I used to lie about the person I was. I created a version of myself that I thought others would like. Nothing was genuine. Absolutely nothing in my life happened organically. I created reasons and motives with the intention of fitting that “mold” I was being 8554a90861afc41c958a5f7ddf7f5af4 (2)poured in.  I know I’m not the only person who has ever done this. We all can get stuck in ruts, whether it be in a relationship, in our job or with our friends, where we design our thinking to accommodate those around us. Our “purpose” becomes skewed. The truth is, we can’t truly know our purpose if we don’t truly know our selves… and listen closely – knowing your TRUE self… it’s scary. Being honest with yourself about the person you are, both goods and bads, is a very intimidating process…. because YOU are the one person YOU can’t run or hide from.

You. That person you can’t hide from. If you’re lucky, you’ll get the pleasure of meeting “You”  when you’re still young enough to find your purpose and EMBRACE it. In Advocare, we ask people the question “What is your purpose?” The answers range but are normally based around money. “To be financially stable.” “To be out of debt” or sometimes even just “To make a lot of money”. And then you get the broad answers “My Kids.” “My Family.” “My Husband.” Don’t get me wrong – those are all good REASONS to try and be successful at something… but thats what they are… they are REASONS. I want to know your PURPOSE. What is it that gives you a knot in your stomach you want it so badly? What is it that makes your nose burn as you hold back tears when you talk about it? Find that. That is your purpose. And you can have more than one. No one had ever asked me what my purpose was before. Wanna know what my answer was 6 months ago? “My family.” haha Yep. I was a “broad answer girl.” Wanna know what it is now? How much time do you have?! LOL I eat, sleep and breathe my purpose.

530178_10151107924659905_805091641_n (2)Brittany, Whats your purpose? My purpose(s)… well, 1) To bring my husband home. I say this to people all the time… but my biggest fear for my family is that my sons kindergarten teacher will pass us in the store and my husband will have no clue who she is. Not because he’s a bad dad… but because he is working SO hard just to pay some bills, that he’s missing his sons life happening before MY eyes. I refuse to let my husband miss those moments just because he bears the burden of supporting our family alone. 2) To help as many people and touch as many lives as I possibly can with the time that God is giving me on this earth. I found this passion years ago when I realized that I have been blessed with the ability to speak and have people listen (or at least pretend to! LOL – Thanks by the way!) To see lives around me changing all because I refuse to let them sink, that makes my heart happy. My purpose is YOUR purpose. 3) To exemplify what it is to be a good, honest, CHRISTIAN woman. This is what I struggle with. But I am getting closer and closer every day. I am flawed… so flawed. But the grace of my Lord and Saviour allows me to wake up and try again! I have learned that what I allow is what I become. I have started reading my Bible more, as well as other Christian leadership books. I have started praying more… and listening to God speak to me as much as I expect him to listen to me! I have started listening to Christian music. I want to surround myself with His glory. My purpose is to make God proud. 4) To be a champion. The definition of Champion is “An ardent defender of purpose.” There it is. My ultimate purpose is to be an ARDENT DEFENDER OF MY PURPOSE!!! To be a CHAMPION. THE Champion.

There you have it. How to find your purpose. Now, how to live a purpose driven life? Stick. That’s right. Stick with it. Every day… strive to be better. Strive to be a champion – an ardent defender of your purpose. There will be days (probably more days like this than otherwise) that will be hard or distracting. Days that you feel like your kids just cant get it together. Days that you and your spouse just wont quit bickering. Days that the bills are piled higher than yesterday. It’s these days… from the average perspective, these are the days that slow you down. But why be average? Why contribute to mediocrity by allowing these days to be excuses?! STOP! Use these days to DRIVE you towards your purpose. Use these days be the fuel in the fire!! I can’t say this passionately enough! (I could use bold, italic, ALL CAPS font but I don’t wanna scare you away haha). Dont be the average. KNOW that at the end of the tunnel is a light… because the light was lit by YOU! That light is your purpose… and you should let NOTHING stop you from getting there. Be pushed forward by those moments that weigh you down… and know that those moments are NOT your truth. Those moments are just helping you become… a champion. You just have to push… stick and stay. Be consistent. Never quit.

10298693_10154357062335234_1711219121980161201_n (2)Whoa, Brittany! That was intense! haha YES! Yes it was. Wanna know why? I’m not standing up here on a pedestal trying to tell you all how to live your life. I am staring in a mirror – saying all this to myself! I am not a Harvard graduate in psychotherapy. I just know that this blog is not only an opportunity to reach out to others and help them find a way towards whatever answers they are looking to find but as a way of manifesting my OWN truth and motivation to be MORE. We are all in this race together. Lets lock arms and help each other towards our light at the end of the tunnel. I hope you all know that I genuinely appreciate and am humbled by the ability to reach out to all of you. Thank you for being part of my purpose. Thank you for helping me Be A Champion<3